17 October 2007 ~ 64 Comments

Why I Think Facebook Sucks Worse Then A Cheap Vegas Hooker!

Yep, I said it… FACEBOOK SUCKS!

Listen, I understand that Facebook may be growing like a Barry Bonds bicep on steroids. And sure, every marketer and their mother is touting how Facebook is the next best thing. But I’m here to you tell that in my opinion that site sucks more balls then a $30 prostitute in need of a crack rock fix.

Here’s my beef with Facebook…

It’s got so many modules and applications that the whole damn thing is confusing as hell. Sure, if you are a 9th grade lad who has all the time in the world to read… “Johnny sent you Vampire Invitation” or “Bonnie sent you a Naughty Request” then I can understand why you may like Facebook.

But I’m no high school kid with all the time in the world to read pointless messages. Yes, pointless, annoying, irrelevant to me making money messages! Please stop sending them.

If you want to be my friend fine. Just add me.

But for the life of god please don’t send me a damn Beer on Facebook. Seriously, don’t even think of sending me a digital beer that I can’t even drink!

Personally I want to make a application that “Throws Beer In Your Face” every time someone sends me a beer that I can’t even drink. You might as well send me a half rack of warm Milwaukee’s Best to my doorstep, because it’s going to end up in the same place… The Trash!

If you want to send me a beer, buy a nice case of imported beer and send it to my house. Or buy me one at a seminar, but don’t send me one on Facebook. What a waste of time! And hey, if you send beer to my house, guess what the chance of me sending a affiliate promotion for you would be? DING DING DING, probably about 100% most of the time.

But when you send me irrelevant garbage on Facebook that just confuses me, wastes my time, and annoys the hell out of me what do you think you get?

That’s right, a big WTF?

Listen, I don’t hate these social networking sites. In fact, I love Myspace. Myspace is chill because I don’t get 9000 different people sending me bullshit that I can’t do anything with. Myspace does a great job of cutting down spam and making things really simple.

Facebook on the other hand has so many idiots creating applications that should be taken out back and shot like Old Yeller! Why in the hell would I want to join a group called “Magic 8 Ball Group” or “People Who Wear Crocs Suck”?

Can somebody say total waste of time?

Not only is it a waste of time, but it’s polluting what could be a decent site. Facebook, you blow. Your application developers blow, and most of the users blow too!

Boy, can you tell how much I love Facebook.

So please don’t ask me to “write on your wall”, join your “dragon group” or any other juvenile garbage that goes on in Facebook. If you want to have a legitimate talk, let’s talk. But contacting me about joining your high schoolish lame group is not the way to get my attention.

Okay, I think you get my feelings about Facebook.

However, I will say if you are a developer and you have half a brain left in your noggin, Facebook can be killer. I know a guy who built a app and has over 1,000,000 users download it. I think it has about 5000 or so active users everyday.

It’s a module that is cool, and serves a purpose. It’s not some lame “come join our Donkey Show Secrets Group”.

So Facebook does have some potential in my mind, but only if you are a developer who is creating something useful that others really want to use.

But if you are just one of the herd, spending your time running around joining this group and joining that group, and sending me fake ass beers I’m here to say in my best “Chris Crocker” voice…

“Leave Jason Moffatt Alone! He’s A Human Being”.

So Facebook users, treat me like a human being, not some random target who you think might want to join your group about picking Dingleberries out of my ass!

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64 Responses to “Why I Think Facebook Sucks Worse Then A Cheap Vegas Hooker!”

  1. big jason 27 October 2007 at 4:12 pm Permalink

    some of these comments are like when people say “myspace marketing is dead”.

    what they really mean to say is “I suck at it therefore it sucks and to hell with anybody who says otherwise”

    mari smith has a free class going on right now which shows you how to make facebook work for you and your business. Read about it at my blog.
    http://www.bigmarketingonline.com/facebook-is-a-huge-waste-of-time-for-internet-marketers.html

    big jason (formerly little jason in lets say 3rd grade)

  2. Chas 3 November 2007 at 10:35 am Permalink

    And I’m having a hard enough time keeping up with my kid and his myspace account.

    ————————————————
    Remember when……..
    Http://www.Vintage-Ads.com

  3. Sam 10 December 2007 at 4:43 am Permalink

    Rather ironic I feel, ranting about a social network ‘wasting your precious time’ when we just read that complete load of bollocks that you could have written in five sentences. You make the same point about 10 times. You don’t even present any decent arguments; you can change your settings not to receive certain posts. Facebook kills Myspace everytime, and global statisitcs agree.

    Stop wasting peoples time talking bullshit!

  4. Ike 30 December 2007 at 4:18 pm Permalink

    Ok, here is your problem, you are asking for spam so they give it to you. If you click someone as your friend, and they send you spam (and you ask and they still send) then remove them from their friends list, and slap yourself in the face for adding someone who obviously has zero respect for you (and im guessing you don’t know) as your friend online. For all you know he was an identity thief or axe murderer looking for details on your life.

  5. Rick 21 February 2008 at 5:09 am Permalink

    Do you remember “you’ve got mail” some people their only interaction with people is online.

    You are our poster boy for
    “From outhouse to penthouse in 20 videos”

    I want royalties from the move—lol–

    You have just crushed a bunch of Jason Moffatt worshipers.

    Rick

  6. Manish 6 April 2008 at 4:36 pm Permalink

    I have also face book account .. and I think it’s good social networking site.

    *****************
    Spread The Word Out! A New Way To Advertise Online!
    http://www.widecircles.com

  7. Ryan 21 April 2008 at 4:50 am Permalink

    J-Mo

    I’m not sure what’s better. Your awesome copy in this post ;) or the comments and “freenzy” you’ve created.. only one word… Brilliant!

    keep up the great work profit

    -R


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